Mending the year (livestream invitation)
It’s that time of year again… and I’ll admit I find it challenging, especially this year with a very fresh, very sad family loss.
At my last livestream I said I’d set something up for the end of December, and this is as much to give me something to aim for as it is to welcome you if you’re in need of some hopeful sad songs, friendly chat and community.
Date: Friday 29th December 2023
Time: 8pm UK (turn up and chat from 7.45pm)
Entry: FREE to all, just make sure you subscribe to join the chat
Watch link: https://www.youtube.com/live/zM5tNEDElFY?si=Yo_P2_BQcnNlJIw-
The concept of being able to “mend the year” (a lyric from my 2016 song “Paper Thin”) is something I picked up from Siegfried Sassoon’s 1916 anti-war poem “In The Pink”.
“For once his blood ran warm; he had pay to spend. Winter was passing; soon the year would mend.”
I try not to wish my precious moments away, but have often found myself in late November / early December wanting to skip to the end and launch fresh into the New Year. There’s something about turning the proverbial page that appeals so much to me, as arbitrary as the shift from 31st December to 1st January may be.
“Paper Thin” is a song about picking myself up after one of my worst years – 2014. Bereavements, breakups, illnesses…it was one of those years where you can’t believe yet another rubbish thing has happened, and you wonder how much more you can take. And then another rubbish thing happens.
“I’m in the wars – I blame the bad weather
A flood of tears, I drift without a shelter
Reduce my world to things that I have worked for
I lick my wounds and wonder if I can mend the year”
In the song I didn’t want to leave things to nature, as Sassoon’s poem does – how sure does he sound? “Soon the year would mend” – because I like to think I’ve got control over things (haha). Instead, I list the things I know will help me:
“I heal myself with friends and conversation
Some time alone, a sober celebration.”
It’s helpful, when I find myself thrust back into those feelings of loss, grief and sadness, to remember these lyrics come from experience. And that the feelings aren’t insignificant, but they do shift and change and feel less BIG with time.
All of which is to say: if you’re feeling less than jolly with Christmas round the corner, I get it. You’re not alone. It helps me to know that I’m not, so thanks for being here.
Jolly or not, you’re welcome at the livestream next Friday. Bring yourself, a tasty drink and a snack and any questions/comments for the live chat (you’re also welcome to stay quiet and just watch).
Warmest wishes and lots of love
Laura xxx